I have always been interested in the lifestyle. My natural curiosity about people and My ability to watch and listen to their subtle messages as well as their more brazen ones have brought Me many enjoyable hours.

Like most people, I can trace my interest in the Leather lifestyle, which you will hear me refer to as, "the scene" or "the lifestyle" to a very young age. Which role I played did not seem to make much difference to Me then. It wasn't until I really began to understand the deeper meanings and responsibilities of being this way that I realized My true yearnings.

Like most really good Mistresses, I spent some time as a submissive.
You will notice that I did not say "on my knees" because I could never quite get there. From time to time a Man I really respected could get me to call him "Sir" but it was the rare occasion that I was on My knees and even then it was probably because someone had a hold on My hair and was forcing me there. (I'm rather vain and was worried about it messing up My pretty locks). A former Dom of Mine who is very dear to My heart summed it up pretty well when he said, "Well "little one", (a term he uses with Me to this day, I suspect to piss Me off just because He can) "in addition to the fact that it was you that added all this gray to My hair, I can probably safely say that you were just a "sucky" slave." I laugh and really don't mind this description because He is right. What that time DID do for Me was teach Me to be a really good Mistress. I rarely ask My property to do anything that I have not felt or know the "call" for. I know their fear AND their hunger.

I also take ownership of another human being very seriously and I do NOT consider it a gift. If a slave wants to be Mine, they have to work for it. I don't chase down submission and since it IS such a huge responsibility, I don't accept it unless I feel COMPELLED to do so because, like pets.... for Me... once I own a slave, they are Mine forever... no matter where they go or whether they still wear the Steel of My collar or not.

Now for a VERY IMPORTANT fact to know about Me... I'm not a girlfriend
Domme.... I'm a Mistress!

There is a huge difference. A relationship between Me and what is Mine is all about slave and Owner. I cherish them because they are Mine and because they are unique and intrigue Me. I do love them and can be fierce and dangerous if I feel they are being hurt or misused in anyway. But they belong to ME.. not the other way around. They were not "courted" by Me to become Mine. They are usually Mine because they begged so long and stayed around Me so long I became enamored of them and found that for them NOT to be there upset Me. I try My utmost not to let Myself become "upset". I find it a distasteful emotion, right up there with jealous or angry. One cannot be in control if you are beset with ANY of these emotions and if I cannot be in "control" how in the world could a slave trust Me to be in "control" of him or her.

I suppose now is a good time to talk a little about the fact that I am
"Gorean". This topic has really been a hot one, which amuses Me. I started out like many people by finding this wonderful online host of people who were "like ME". I was amazed to know that I was not the only "perverted" person in the world. The first time I walked into a "scene" chat room, I felt like Dorothy standing on the steps of OZ when they finally swung those giant doors open and color flooded into Her life. Life was about to get "normal" for Me. I was where I belonged with people that understood Me. My vanilla life just wasn't enough anymore and I played and grew there with
people I will cherish always. Soon I started venturing into real life
meetings and visits and I now have friends on several continents and in many states. After a while, I started feeling that I wanted more.... a deeper fuller more structured environment to play in. Gor was that for Me. I found the need to study it to play there rewarding. It takes a good brain to play in the Gorean arena.

Despite the fact that I am often criticized by others that have never
bothered to get to know Me before deciding to prattle on about Me, I DO
realize Gor is a fantasy world. But WHAT a wonderful one. Gor taught Me
how to balance being a Mistress with being a Woman. It created a realm
which enabled Me to retain that dainty lil girl inside yet wield the Steel
necessary to control another human being. It also brought a structure that I found beautiful and that could round out a slave to be the best they can be. It gives them something to work towards, a way to please ME which they are so hungry to do and teaches them a discipline that they can use in all other aspects of their lives to be successful. So, I took Gor and put it under a microscope (just like I do any slave I am interested in or own) and then poured it into a colander and let the parts I could use real life filter through. Those philosophies are the ones I bring home to practice and put to good use. So to those who criticize Me and Mine for our Gorean practices I say, fill your mind with the facts before you let it spew forth your noble words.

One final word of warning about Gor, Gor is not what it used to be. Beware of those that SAY they are Gorean. There are many slaves now walking Gor in Robes of the Free.

I am married to a wonderful Brazilian. He is younger than I am by several years but we are well paired. Now another fact about Me. I am not a switch. This man is Dominant and I needed that in My life. He grounds Me. He keeps Me from being an intolerable vain bossy Bitch. He is My strength and My partner. He reminds Me that I am a Woman and although I have not been on My knees to Him.. I HAVE been over His lap and probably will again. There are times that I JUST don't know when to quit. I do sometimes surpass His ability to "take" it.  I am very smart and usually know when to "back off" so it's not a common occurrence. He knows of My boys and has no jealousy towards them. He knows they occupy a different place of my heart. I don't mind either if he has a slave. I don't share what is Mine with Him or vice versa but if We all want to play together.. well that is fine too. We have a "household". What is Mine and what is His.. are all a part of that household.

I think it's important to talk a little about how I perceive property that belongs to Me. It is rare for Me to only own one slave. Gorean
trained slaves understand the "chain". Those from the realm of D/s usually do not, having been used to being the favored pet. To Me, each slave is unique, bringing to Me something different from the other. I love to watch them interact with each other as a family. Where one boy likes to be mischievous the other likes to be good and this can make for a very entertaining time. When I grow tired of the antics of one I can settle into the arms of the other with a sigh of relief. A girl brings a whole new aspect to the scene or a boy that likes to dress up even furthering the experience. Life is an experience and I don't believe in tamping that down. There is no reason for there to be jealousy between slaves in My chain because they all know that there is NO OTHER like them for Me. They are special and each one is My precious possession.

I also rarely restrict My property from other Dominants as long as I know them and respect their ability and philosophy to be "responsible" with what is Mine. I know there are areas that I don't go to that My property can get from these Sisters or Brothers of Mine. Rather than be jealous, I am relieved that they can play this part to My slave. This way, they and My slave find a release and "I", have found a Dominant friend that I can "share" with. I try very hard not to cry on the shoulder of My slaves or whine or bitch about life. I will share My life with them and I make Myself available real life to My slaves. I just don't want their energy going to "fixing" things for Me. If I can't hold MY life together, how can I have influence over theirs?

I pretty much see a slave as a slave and if an un-collared slave is brave
enough to want to interact with ME, I enjoy this. I just enjoy slaves in
general. I am respectful of their collar if they are owned but do not see
it as an excuse to be obnoxious or a way "out" of correction to hide behind it. I feel that if another Dominant doesn't want their slave to "Play" they should teach them that and train them in what they can and cannot do. In what is acceptable to Him or Her for their slave to do with another Dominant. IN the on-line/irc arena, it should say "restricted" in their profile if they are not to play with others. I do feel sorry for those slaves that often sit online for hours, waiting for a Mistress or Master to
come online and are not allowed to feed their hunger with others. I think it's a cruel thing to do and shows a weakness and insecurity in that Dominant that demands this of them.

Finally, I will say that I like Me. I am always a work in progress. I am
always learning and if I were to choose a word that I think is really,
really important it would be TOLERANCE. It's a discipline I choose and wish more people did. If so, our community would not be so demonized. I try to continue to learn and be tolerant that others in the community have chosen forms of it that I may find distasteful but is what they need.